Thursday, December 29, 2011
Thursday, November 3, 2011
The More the Merrier
Announcing the formation of our Kuzmich family blog, to the gaiety of nations and grandparents:
http://kuzmichconstitutional.blogspot.com/
http://kuzmichconstitutional.blogspot.com/
Monday, October 31, 2011
My Loverly Liezel
She is a mother, wife and companion; devoted and faithful. Her smile brightens the darkest day. She welcomes with a tender embrace. Her love is assuring. She is wise; quick to forgive and slow to judge. Never was there a lovelier rose in the garden of my life.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Autumnal Adventure
Monday, August 8, 2011
Impressions
I am amazed by the pure and simple magic that is impersonation. Perhaps I am not as acutely aware, but it seems to me that a great majority of voice impersonations are performed by men. Could it be akin to male song birds, wooing their female companions, but through humor? But I digress. Enjoy a truly remarkable display of awesomeness in the following clip:
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
...and I'm a Mormon
I consider myself a connoisseur of commercials, having amassed a sizable collection of personal favorites. The cinematography, music and punch lines combine to make memorable works of art (and hopefully sell something in the process).
In my latest search, I have happened upon some memorable commercials from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Each commercial emphasizes a gospel principle from the perspective of a given member of said church, drawing upon their own unique and sometimes challenging life experiences. I admit I am no Chuck Norris and I may have teared up watching some of them (but only a eensie weensie bit in the most manly way).
In my opinion, they are refreshing and feel good worthy of which I highly recommend regardless of belief system. Some of my favorites are Marco, Eric, Nadia, Allan, Victor, and Jane to name a few. Each week, I find myself looking forward to meeting someone new and seeing the beauty in life. Makes me wanna go and carpe some diem!
In my latest search, I have happened upon some memorable commercials from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Each commercial emphasizes a gospel principle from the perspective of a given member of said church, drawing upon their own unique and sometimes challenging life experiences. I admit I am no Chuck Norris and I may have teared up watching some of them (but only a eensie weensie bit in the most manly way).
In my opinion, they are refreshing and feel good worthy of which I highly recommend regardless of belief system. Some of my favorites are Marco, Eric, Nadia, Allan, Victor, and Jane to name a few. Each week, I find myself looking forward to meeting someone new and seeing the beauty in life. Makes me wanna go and carpe some diem!
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Canning 101: An Exercise in Patience
I'd like to preface this post with the following scripture:
"And now I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive," (Book of Mormon, Alma 7:23).
You're might be thinking: what could this possibly have to do with canning? Well, everything actually. Over the past few weekends, the wife and I have been learning about self reliance in the following areas: education, health, employment, home storage, finances, spiritual strength. We discussed plans and ways to make strides and improvements in each of these areas; however, of particular concern was our sad state in home storage (i.e. food/water storage, 72 hour emergency kit, etc..). In addressing this concern, our effort lately has been focused on learning how to look for food sales and preserve food via pressure canning.
Learning new things is fun, right? Indeed, but if things should go awry and your kitchen turns into the insides of a honey jar, you might as well enjoy the journey. I am pleased to report, we have been successful in canning chicken, peaches and strawberry/blueberry jam. Each one brought with it a unique set of trials and setbacks. Cutting raw chicken is awkward. Preparing imperfect peaches is an uphill battle. Shrapnel from exploding bubbles of boiling jam is hot; very hot. But after the maelstrom, there is a feeling of satisfaction when you can finally see the fruit of your labors. Canning teaches patience and diligence. And in my opinion, preserving and laying up fruit against the season is just another way to cherish the many blessings from a loving Heavenly Father.
"And now I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive," (Book of Mormon, Alma 7:23).
You're might be thinking: what could this possibly have to do with canning? Well, everything actually. Over the past few weekends, the wife and I have been learning about self reliance in the following areas: education, health, employment, home storage, finances, spiritual strength. We discussed plans and ways to make strides and improvements in each of these areas; however, of particular concern was our sad state in home storage (i.e. food/water storage, 72 hour emergency kit, etc..). In addressing this concern, our effort lately has been focused on learning how to look for food sales and preserve food via pressure canning.
Learning new things is fun, right? Indeed, but if things should go awry and your kitchen turns into the insides of a honey jar, you might as well enjoy the journey. I am pleased to report, we have been successful in canning chicken, peaches and strawberry/blueberry jam. Each one brought with it a unique set of trials and setbacks. Cutting raw chicken is awkward. Preparing imperfect peaches is an uphill battle. Shrapnel from exploding bubbles of boiling jam is hot; very hot. But after the maelstrom, there is a feeling of satisfaction when you can finally see the fruit of your labors. Canning teaches patience and diligence. And in my opinion, preserving and laying up fruit against the season is just another way to cherish the many blessings from a loving Heavenly Father.
Peaches on sale for 47 cents/lbs is not an everyday occurrence, so we did the sensible thing and ransacked the local grocery store.
Chicken was poached pre-canning to ensure eradication of harmful bacteria. Kitchen was scrubbed to the same effect.
Boiling peaches. This process was very educational in how to select peaches in the future.
Yellow gold!
Constant stirring to help thwart jelly attacks. "Wax on, Wax off" technique came in quite handy.
And by their fruits, ye shall know them.
And by their fruits, ye shall know them.Monday, June 27, 2011
Bonsai Bonanza
A celebration of the blessed bonsai was held at the Denver Botanic Gardens not too long ago. The Rocky Mountain Bonsai Society sponsored true eye candy, showcasing several varieties and styles. The age of the bonsai on display ranged from a dozen to over many hundreds of years. It was obvious that none of these beautiful specimens were for sale. Of particular interest was the presentation. The design behind each bonsai was impressive. Many of the plants were accompanied with detailed moss cropping, bamboo backdrop and unique display stools. So without further adieu ladies and gentlemen, commence your drooling:
Japanese Maple
Dawn Redwood
Chinese Elm
Windswept style (Juniper sp.)
Another Japanese Maple
Dawn Redwood
Ponderosa Pine?
Azalea
Trident Maple
Forest or Raft style (Chinese Elm)
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Concerning Marmots
A marmot? What in the world is that? I asked myself these questions after spotting a sign for marmot crossing near Aspen, CO:
Marmots, one of mother nature's lesser-known creatures, are in the same genus as the ground squirrel. I think of them as large, pudgy squirrels that feed on grasses, flowers and berries in mountainous regions. According to the sign, marmots come in two different sizes: strangely large and freakishly huge. Of their typical behaviors, they seem to enjoy sitting on large rocks and mocking passers-by.
Therefore, when in Rome... do as the marmots:
Marmots, one of mother nature's lesser-known creatures, are in the same genus as the ground squirrel. I think of them as large, pudgy squirrels that feed on grasses, flowers and berries in mountainous regions. According to the sign, marmots come in two different sizes: strangely large and freakishly huge. Of their typical behaviors, they seem to enjoy sitting on large rocks and mocking passers-by.
Therefore, when in Rome... do as the marmots:
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Wok Talk
Friends, Countrymen, Romans... Give me your seasoned woks!
29 revolutions around the sun and I now have come to understand that not all woks are created equal. Indeed, the carbon steel wok is the grand-daddy of them all, and more seasoned they are the tastier the food. This may look like copper, but it ain't so:
'Seasoning' prepares the wok for cooking. This sometimes lengthy process is well documented using both stove-top and oven: Seasoning Method. One not-so pleasant side-effect was the waft of metallic-oil fumes, though nothing a fan or two couldn't handle. The lovely wife sent words of encouragement from the far side of the apartment. How sweet.
I may be yet a young grasshopper in the field of stir-fry-topia, but timid I am not.
29 revolutions around the sun and I now have come to understand that not all woks are created equal. Indeed, the carbon steel wok is the grand-daddy of them all, and more seasoned they are the tastier the food. This may look like copper, but it ain't so:
'Seasoning' prepares the wok for cooking. This sometimes lengthy process is well documented using both stove-top and oven: Seasoning Method. One not-so pleasant side-effect was the waft of metallic-oil fumes, though nothing a fan or two couldn't handle. The lovely wife sent words of encouragement from the far side of the apartment. How sweet.
I may be yet a young grasshopper in the field of stir-fry-topia, but timid I am not.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Classical Music Top 40
Last weekend the wife and I took a night out to the symphony. The concert featured a "Classical Music Top 40" theme (10 pieces total) showcasing uber-popular hits like Pachelbel's Canon in D, Bizet's Toreador from Carmen, and Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries.
In the movie "Chocolate" (2000), there are several scenes where Vianne (a drifter and chocolatier) attempts in vain to guess the favorite chocolate desert of one Roux (another drifter). Each time Vianne offers Roux a different chocolate sweet, he replies something to the effect of "very good, but not my favorite". In a similar fashion I found the concert to be very good, but not my favorite.
I've thought about it some more and compiled a list of what I think would make some of my favorite "Top 40" program (that is not part of a string quartet, solo work, symphony, concerto, opera or multiple pieces from the same composer - for this list, please reference my forthcoming "Top 500"). I've hyperlinked the following pieces via Youtube for your listening pleasure (some of the links may not have the best sound quality):
Beethoven: Egmont Overture
Gustav Holst: Jupiter from "The Planets"
Mussorgsky: Baba Yaga
Tchaikovsky: "Swan Lake" Suite
Elgar: Enigma Variations (Nimrod)
Prokofiev: Troika from Lieutenant Kije
Dvorak: Slavonic Dance No. 1
Barber: Adagio for Strings
Vivaldi: Presto (Summer) from "Four Seasons"
Mozart: Adagio Serenade No 10 in B Flat
Bach: Toccata and Fugue in d minor arr. Leopold Stokowski for orchestra
In the movie "Chocolate" (2000), there are several scenes where Vianne (a drifter and chocolatier) attempts in vain to guess the favorite chocolate desert of one Roux (another drifter). Each time Vianne offers Roux a different chocolate sweet, he replies something to the effect of "very good, but not my favorite". In a similar fashion I found the concert to be very good, but not my favorite.
I've thought about it some more and compiled a list of what I think would make some of my favorite "Top 40" program (that is not part of a string quartet, solo work, symphony, concerto, opera or multiple pieces from the same composer - for this list, please reference my forthcoming "Top 500"). I've hyperlinked the following pieces via Youtube for your listening pleasure (some of the links may not have the best sound quality):
Beethoven: Egmont Overture
Gustav Holst: Jupiter from "The Planets"
Mussorgsky: Baba Yaga
Tchaikovsky: "Swan Lake" Suite
Elgar: Enigma Variations (Nimrod)
Prokofiev: Troika from Lieutenant Kije
Dvorak: Slavonic Dance No. 1
Barber: Adagio for Strings
Vivaldi: Presto (Summer) from "Four Seasons"
Mozart: Adagio Serenade No 10 in B Flat
Bach: Toccata and Fugue in d minor arr. Leopold Stokowski for orchestra
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
You Are What You Eat
Today's blog post is brought to you by the word, Twinkie [too-ween-key] -noun: A kind of soft yellowish euphoria wrapped in plastic. A staple food of many young and unassuming North Americans.
Twinkies are said to consist of 37 ingredients, but I counted only two, white and yellow.
Apart from clotting our arteries and making ding dongs jealous, Twinkies have enjoyed a bustling 80+ year (shelf) life. For many of us growing up, Twinkie the Kid was a cultural icon, wrangling the likes of Captain Cupcake and Fruit Pie the Magician. Today, his fame and jovial smile continue to outlast all other wannabee snack cakes. Indeed, this golden sponge cake with creamy filling has made its mark on history; a soft pudgy mark.
Twinkies are said to consist of 37 ingredients, but I counted only two, white and yellow.
Apart from clotting our arteries and making ding dongs jealous, Twinkies have enjoyed a bustling 80+ year (shelf) life. For many of us growing up, Twinkie the Kid was a cultural icon, wrangling the likes of Captain Cupcake and Fruit Pie the Magician. Today, his fame and jovial smile continue to outlast all other wannabee snack cakes. Indeed, this golden sponge cake with creamy filling has made its mark on history; a soft pudgy mark.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Up Up and Away
A little over a year ago, my then soon-to-be betrothed asked me what I might like for Christmas. Honestly, I did not care for anything in the world except to be with her for Christmas; however, not to disappoint and list off at least one pithy yet tangible desire, I answered something to the effect of "it would be great if I had the title to the planet Jupiter."
Fast-forward a year and one month and to my great surprise and delight, even far-out dreams can come true:
"The International board of Planetary Ownership Petitions (IBPOP) Bern, Switzerland, certifies that Dallin Kuzmich of the United States of America, State of Colorado, City of Boulder has been awarded the sole title and full ownership of THE PLANET JUPITER. By right of inheritance and as the last dying wish of Walter Rzeszowskiego (your father's favorite uncle's half-brother's third cousin, twice removed). The Honorable Mr. Rzeszowskiego served as the President of IBPOP for 62 years. He passed away in his board of director's chair on 8 Dec 2010. Please present this certificate on all charter flights to Jupiter to receive first-class service. A history of the planet, satellite photography originals, and a sample of Jupiterian soil are forthcoming. Given this sixteenth day of December, two thousand and ten."
Dearest Liezel - you are a talented and creative wonder! How does a trip to Jupiter tomorrow sound? I'll fill the hydrazine/oxidizer tanks; just bring that beautiful smile of yours :)
Fast-forward a year and one month and to my great surprise and delight, even far-out dreams can come true:
"The International board of Planetary Ownership Petitions (IBPOP) Bern, Switzerland, certifies that Dallin Kuzmich of the United States of America, State of Colorado, City of Boulder has been awarded the sole title and full ownership of THE PLANET JUPITER. By right of inheritance and as the last dying wish of Walter Rzeszowskiego (your father's favorite uncle's half-brother's third cousin, twice removed). The Honorable Mr. Rzeszowskiego served as the President of IBPOP for 62 years. He passed away in his board of director's chair on 8 Dec 2010. Please present this certificate on all charter flights to Jupiter to receive first-class service. A history of the planet, satellite photography originals, and a sample of Jupiterian soil are forthcoming. Given this sixteenth day of December, two thousand and ten."
Dearest Liezel - you are a talented and creative wonder! How does a trip to Jupiter tomorrow sound? I'll fill the hydrazine/oxidizer tanks; just bring that beautiful smile of yours :)
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Freedom
When you think of the word "freedom", certain ideas come to mind. The ability to make choices and freedom from oppression or confinement. I submit an addition to the list: Freedom from pesky credit unions.
Story goes: when moving from Upstate New York to Colorado, I "attempted" to close out my account with the local bank; however, their mystical "you-need-us" powers were too great for my gullible defense. So during and after the move, I simply forgot about it and found a new bank. Fast-forward two years and I discover that I am now in debt to said credit union, on account of a policy stating something to the effect "in the absence of a monthly direct deposit, we will deduct x dollars from your account".
I grudgingly pay the amount due, and interestingly enough, have certifiable proof of riddance in the form of a one cent check! Now the question bears mentioning; what things can you buy with a penny?
Story goes: when moving from Upstate New York to Colorado, I "attempted" to close out my account with the local bank; however, their mystical "you-need-us" powers were too great for my gullible defense. So during and after the move, I simply forgot about it and found a new bank. Fast-forward two years and I discover that I am now in debt to said credit union, on account of a policy stating something to the effect "in the absence of a monthly direct deposit, we will deduct x dollars from your account".
I grudgingly pay the amount due, and interestingly enough, have certifiable proof of riddance in the form of a one cent check! Now the question bears mentioning; what things can you buy with a penny?
Sunday, January 16, 2011
To Boldly Go
Last week's Family Home Evening (FHE) was my turn to prepare the lesson and activity. I admit I hadn't given much thought to it so when the time came, I had to improvise. Eyeing a certain cut-out template in the corner of the room, it was only a matter of time before Book of Mormon passages aligned themselves to form the framework for a lesson. The prophet Lehi was commanded of the Lord to depart Jerusalem and with his family, take journey to a promised land. The lesson was good, and the application simple:
By faithful obedience in keeping the commandments, the Lord prepares a path for us to cross our individual "seas" (obstacles) wherein we will be led to "better lands" (finding greater spiritual fulfillment and joy).
And for the activity, rather than building a sea-bearing vessel to cross the great ocean, I thought it only fitting that we construct the Orion Crew Exploration Capsule to cross the immensity of space; all from a cut-out!
The ensuing activity turned into a lesson of extreme patience, as many tiny and fragile pieces needed to be carefully removed and folded with surgical precision. Twice, the space vehicle was rushed to the high bay for advanced welding repairs (scissors & tape). After an hour I awoke the wife, already suffering the drowsy effects of four dimensional space travel, to christen the HMS Liahona. Great Success!
By faithful obedience in keeping the commandments, the Lord prepares a path for us to cross our individual "seas" (obstacles) wherein we will be led to "better lands" (finding greater spiritual fulfillment and joy).
And for the activity, rather than building a sea-bearing vessel to cross the great ocean, I thought it only fitting that we construct the Orion Crew Exploration Capsule to cross the immensity of space; all from a cut-out!
The ensuing activity turned into a lesson of extreme patience, as many tiny and fragile pieces needed to be carefully removed and folded with surgical precision. Twice, the space vehicle was rushed to the high bay for advanced welding repairs (scissors & tape). After an hour I awoke the wife, already suffering the drowsy effects of four dimensional space travel, to christen the HMS Liahona. Great Success!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Attack of the Ginger Spice
***Attention - This blog post is not for tiny children nor the faint of heart***
RELEASE THE NINJAS!
These stealthy warriors are set to sneak into your kitchen and stage a cookie coup!
Your hands move like a whisper, cutting dark shapes into pre-rolled dough; mere minutes away from being unleashed upon unsuspecting guests.
Behold their awesomeness and impeccable fashion sense. They mean business.A few facts about ninjas:
Ninja always land on their feet. If they don’t have feet they will land on their nubs.
Ninja always land on their feet. If they don’t have feet they will land on their nubs.
Live in your house secretly for days
Can hover for hours
Flip out and kill everything
Can hide in incense smoke
Bullets dodge ninjas.
Ninjas iron there shirts while wearing them.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
If You Give a Man a Cookie
If you give a man a cookie, he's going to ask for a glass of milk. When you give him the milk, he'll probably ask you for some more cookies. When he's finished with the milk (and cookies), he'll probably sit back and admire his man-stache in the mirror.
probably...
A few days ago I had my own give-a-mouse-cookie experience come back to bite me during prep for dinner. I completely forgot to take the sliced almonds out of the toaster oven. The result: Almendras a la Char - ultra rich in carbon-y goodness.
This blog post was brought to you by the words "Vigilance", "Attentiveness" and "Carcinogenic"
probably...
A few days ago I had my own give-a-mouse-cookie experience come back to bite me during prep for dinner. I completely forgot to take the sliced almonds out of the toaster oven. The result: Almendras a la Char - ultra rich in carbon-y goodness.
This blog post was brought to you by the words "Vigilance", "Attentiveness" and "Carcinogenic"
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Whooosh
Dear Wildly Unpredictable Colorado Weather,
I realize you get bored on occasion and like to "spice" things up. Well, today was totally unacceptable. Your brief 50+mph out-of-no-where wind gush projecting a plethora of horizontally-focused ice/rain pellets on an otherwise beautifully calm sunny day was not appreciated in the least.
Sincerely,
Soggy Pants in Cubicle-land
On the brighter side, I now have a new-found respect for the Mormon pioneers who, despite great odds, trekked across an untamed wilderness, with guiding faith in the Savior. Exercising such faith as this is deserving of Heavenly blessings.
Fortunately tonight, there be a fiddler in this camp to provide vital mental medicine.
I realize you get bored on occasion and like to "spice" things up. Well, today was totally unacceptable. Your brief 50+mph out-of-no-where wind gush projecting a plethora of horizontally-focused ice/rain pellets on an otherwise beautifully calm sunny day was not appreciated in the least.
Sincerely,
Soggy Pants in Cubicle-land
On the brighter side, I now have a new-found respect for the Mormon pioneers who, despite great odds, trekked across an untamed wilderness, with guiding faith in the Savior. Exercising such faith as this is deserving of Heavenly blessings.
Fortunately tonight, there be a fiddler in this camp to provide vital mental medicine.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
My Thousand Words
If a picture is worth a thousand words, then do a thousand words equal a picture? I submit that this is indeed the case given that the words are in "ZDingbats" characters (who designs these wacky fonts anyways? I like food).
Our 4 + month overdue wedding pictures came in the mail this week, providing much joy and relief. They turned out beautifully clear. So here's my thousand words: I love my Liezel, mi perla de gran precio!
Our 4 + month overdue wedding pictures came in the mail this week, providing much joy and relief. They turned out beautifully clear. So here's my thousand words: I love my Liezel, mi perla de gran precio!
Monday, October 25, 2010
Spooks
The great pumpkin carving tradition has begun, with Mr. Mumps. Say hello to your adoring fans Mr. Mumps...
Mr. Mumps was in the dumps, for though he had a large and toothy grin, a beauty contest he'd never win... but WE still love him! Indeed, and then we'll eat him. Happy Halloween and happy pumpkin pie making!
Mr. Mumps was in the dumps, for though he had a large and toothy grin, a beauty contest he'd never win... but WE still love him! Indeed, and then we'll eat him. Happy Halloween and happy pumpkin pie making!
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Engineering Marvel
Swiss engineers completed the world's largest tunnel Friday, drilling through the last few feet of rock needed to complete the 35.4-mile tunnel underneath the Swiss Alps, the Associated Press reported.
The drill bit used to carve the last few feet of solid rock is a pretty spectacular sight. Take a look at the video feed here.
In passing-by, I had the opportunity to meet with the world's largest drill bit and ask a question:
In other news, I learned you can post just about thing in Craigslist, including a post soliciting exotic and ancient lumber for furniture-intended purposes, submitted by yours truly.
The drill bit used to carve the last few feet of solid rock is a pretty spectacular sight. Take a look at the video feed here.
In passing-by, I had the opportunity to meet with the world's largest drill bit and ask a question:
- D: What manner of machine are you that can summon up rock without chisel or hammer?
- T: I... am a drill bit.
- D: By what name are you known?
- T: There are some who call me... 'Tim'...?
- D: ...greetings, Tim the Drill Bit.
In other news, I learned you can post just about thing in Craigslist, including a post soliciting exotic and ancient lumber for furniture-intended purposes, submitted by yours truly.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Born Free
Have you ever sprinted down an enormous mound of sand while recording yourself? If not, I highly recommend it :)
Watch it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2M7avr7_7FU
Watch it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2M7avr7_7FU
The epic downhill journey looking back up the sand dune.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Living Off The Fat of the Land
Mother Nature can be pretty erratic here in Colorado, but in between her bouts of stormy confusion, the sun bakes some mighty fine vegetation. Take a looksie at the early July harvest from the garden we planted at my parents home:
Squash, Zuchini, Green Beans, Peppers and Tomatoes are summer staple foods, chock full of nutrients. So I looked out the window and what did I see? A breathing radioactive superorganism of steroidal chlorophyll (and a photo shoot):
Alissa makes some culinary grand slams from scratch - just short of germinating the millet and sorghum seeds - she whisks together colorful masterpieces that makes mitocondria salivate:
Squash, Zuchini, Green Beans, Peppers and Tomatoes are summer staple foods, chock full of nutrients. So I looked out the window and what did I see? A breathing radioactive superorganism of steroidal chlorophyll (and a photo shoot):
Alissa makes some culinary grand slams from scratch - just short of germinating the millet and sorghum seeds - she whisks together colorful masterpieces that makes mitocondria salivate:
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
20 Second Summary
News Update:
I got married
I gained 0.4 lbs
I live in hippie-ville
Graveyard shifts stink like old gym socks left in the sink
Blog hiatus ending shortly. That is all. Thank you.
I got married
I gained 0.4 lbs
I live in hippie-ville
Graveyard shifts stink like old gym socks left in the sink
Blog hiatus ending shortly. That is all. Thank you.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Of Mommies and Mothers
"O be wise, what more can I say?" This simple phrase from the prophet Jacob tells us that in the end, it would be well with us to just be wise. How often have we heard these and other bits of wisdom from our parents, especially our Mothers? At times in our lives it may seem folly and inconvenient to trust in the guiding counsel of caring Mothers yet we never doubt their reasons. They love us with an unbounded love. They are there to reassure us when all is dark. They help see past our weaknesses and cherish in our triumphs. So here's to you Mom on this beautifully sunny Mother's Day; may you rejoice in that happiness which is reserved for those who give with all their heart. I love you.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Belated April Fools
A fanciful article that wins for originality as well as comedic relief:
http://crave.cnet.co.uk/gadgets/0,39029552,49305387,00.htm
http://crave.cnet.co.uk/gadgets/0,39029552,49305387,00.htm
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
2600 Big Ones
**WARNING - SOME MATERIAL MAY NOT BE SUITABLE FOR PESSIMISTS AND MEANY HEADS**
You may of heard of the sound barrier but have you heard of the calorie barrier? This gravy-colored lining can be a high bar to hurdle for some or a little people limbo for others. I call upon you: Friends, Romans, Country-fried steaks; lend me your chops!
According to the food pyramid people, to gradually increase in weight, my daily caloric intake must be at a minimum 2600 calories. Dividing that by 5 meals a day leaves me starring down a 520 calorie juggernaut every three hours. To date, my best meal attempt was the forging of a nuclear soy smoothie (~450 calories) which nearly sunk me.
Having learned from sad experiences that substituting overly fatty food for lean meats, grains and vegetables will only result in pain-and-no-gain, I hereby petition you - who doth read my words with much forlorn - to supply any stomach-able and fruitful meal ideas in meeting my cataclysmic calorie challenge. My many thanks :) Calories, ye be warned!
P.S. - whoever can suggest the highest calorie/best-tasting meal wins a big hug! Note: the portion should not exceed 6 ounces as my stomach generally revolts if any more is stuffed in there.
You may of heard of the sound barrier but have you heard of the calorie barrier? This gravy-colored lining can be a high bar to hurdle for some or a little people limbo for others. I call upon you: Friends, Romans, Country-fried steaks; lend me your chops!
According to the food pyramid people, to gradually increase in weight, my daily caloric intake must be at a minimum 2600 calories. Dividing that by 5 meals a day leaves me starring down a 520 calorie juggernaut every three hours. To date, my best meal attempt was the forging of a nuclear soy smoothie (~450 calories) which nearly sunk me.
Having learned from sad experiences that substituting overly fatty food for lean meats, grains and vegetables will only result in pain-and-no-gain, I hereby petition you - who doth read my words with much forlorn - to supply any stomach-able and fruitful meal ideas in meeting my cataclysmic calorie challenge. My many thanks :) Calories, ye be warned!
P.S. - whoever can suggest the highest calorie/best-tasting meal wins a big hug! Note: the portion should not exceed 6 ounces as my stomach generally revolts if any more is stuffed in there.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
What Key Are You?
What dark matter is to astrophysicists, is what musical key characteristics are to musicians. It's a bit of black magic wrapped up inside a gooey delicious cookie just out of the oven. So who's to say what tastes good when it comes to sharps and flats? Answer: you!
Certain musical keys are thought to induce certain emotions. For example (get ready for a really long reference), from Christian Schubart's Ideen zu einer Aesthetik der Tonkunst (1806) translated by Rita Steblin in A History of Key Characteristics in the 18th and Early 19th Centuries (no kidding?), the Key of C denotes a feeling "Completely pure. Its character is: innocence, simplicity, naïvety, children's talk." Of course not everyone hears it the same way. According to Charpentier's Regles de Composition ca. 1682, the Key of C is "gay and warlike."
F# Major indicates "a gloomy key: it tugs at passion as a dog biting a dress. Resentment and discontent are its language." Ask any violinist to play you a tune in such a key and you are asking for trouble. Simply put, it is an evil key; a key which-must-not-be-named (or played).
Eb Major is "the key of love, of devotion, of intimate conversation with God."
Ab minor (and miner) is a "grumbler, heart squeezed until it suffocates; wailing lament, difficult struggle; in a word, the color of this key is everything struggling with difficulty."
Some of my favorite keys are: E major/minor and A Major, ranging from grief to magnificence and splendor. Schubert likened E minor "unto a maiden robed in white with a rose-red bow on her breast." Whoa Schubert, TMI!
In addition to emotion, some have even gone so far as to label keys with colors. No, this is not a drawback to the sixties or shunning those who are color-blind, it's about our sixth sense: food. I bet a lot of early composers got hungry and probably did some of their best work against the petition of a growling tummy. So logically, their eyes would begin to play tricks on them after a while and without warning the Chiquita banana girl with her cornucopia of mouth-watering fruits would leap onto the page and influence the key. A sly green apple? A Major. A humongous juicy watermelon? C Major, etc etc. And thus proves the super commutative property of music: food = color = emotion = music.
Certain musical keys are thought to induce certain emotions. For example (get ready for a really long reference), from Christian Schubart's Ideen zu einer Aesthetik der Tonkunst (1806) translated by Rita Steblin in A History of Key Characteristics in the 18th and Early 19th Centuries (no kidding?), the Key of C denotes a feeling "Completely pure. Its character is: innocence, simplicity, naïvety, children's talk." Of course not everyone hears it the same way. According to Charpentier's Regles de Composition ca. 1682, the Key of C is "gay and warlike."
F# Major indicates "a gloomy key: it tugs at passion as a dog biting a dress. Resentment and discontent are its language." Ask any violinist to play you a tune in such a key and you are asking for trouble. Simply put, it is an evil key; a key which-must-not-be-named (or played).
Eb Major is "the key of love, of devotion, of intimate conversation with God."
Ab minor (and miner) is a "grumbler, heart squeezed until it suffocates; wailing lament, difficult struggle; in a word, the color of this key is everything struggling with difficulty."
Some of my favorite keys are: E major/minor and A Major, ranging from grief to magnificence and splendor. Schubert likened E minor "unto a maiden robed in white with a rose-red bow on her breast." Whoa Schubert, TMI!
In addition to emotion, some have even gone so far as to label keys with colors. No, this is not a drawback to the sixties or shunning those who are color-blind, it's about our sixth sense: food. I bet a lot of early composers got hungry and probably did some of their best work against the petition of a growling tummy. So logically, their eyes would begin to play tricks on them after a while and without warning the Chiquita banana girl with her cornucopia of mouth-watering fruits would leap onto the page and influence the key. A sly green apple? A Major. A humongous juicy watermelon? C Major, etc etc. And thus proves the super commutative property of music: food = color = emotion = music.
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